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Legal Jokes

# Title Hits Rating
1 Why lawyers should never ask a witness a question...
- Why lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren'tprepared for the answer:In a trial, ...Read the whole joke
573 Rating:0 | Voted:0
2 Guilty as sin
- Sue reports for jury duty as ordered, and promptly asks to be excused because she believes she's pre...Read the whole joke
499 Rating:0 | Voted:0
3 What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit?
- What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit?The bucket....Read the whole joke
451 Rating:0 | Voted:0
4 Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
- Why won't sharks attack lawyers?Professional courtesy....Read the whole joke
525 Rating:0 | Voted:0
5 Why don't you ever see lawyers at the beach?
- Why don't you ever see lawyers at the beach?The cats keep covering them up with sand!...Read the whole joke
583 Rating:0 | Voted:0
6 A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights broken...
- A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights broken and his front bumper smashed. There...Read the whole joke
507 Rating:0 | Voted:0
7 The Night Before Christmas, Legally Speaking
- The Night Before Christmas, Legally Speaking:Whereas, on or about the night prior to Christmas, ther...Read the whole joke
538 Rating:0 | Voted:0
8 What do you call an honest lawyer?
- What do you call an honest lawyer?An oxymoron....Read the whole joke
629 Rating:0 | Voted:0
9 What do you call 20 lawyers skydiving?
- What do you call 20 lawyers skydiving?Perfect setup for skeet shooting....Read the whole joke
501 Rating:0 | Voted:0
10 A man walked into a lawyer's office and...
- A man walked into a lawyer's office and inquired about the rates. "Fifty dollars for three questions...Read the whole joke
497 Rating:0 | Voted:0
11 A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights...
- A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlightsbroken and considerable damage. There's no ...Read the whole joke
469 Rating:0 | Voted:0
12 Mr. Dewey was briefing his client, who was about to...
- Mr. Dewey was briefing his client, who was about to testify in his own defense. "You must swear to t...Read the whole joke
524 Rating:0 | Voted:0
13 Do you know the problem with lawyer jokes?
- Do you know the problem with lawyer jokes?Lawyers don't think they're funny, and the rest of us don'...Read the whole joke
593 Rating:0 | Voted:0
14 Why does the law prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?
- Why does the law prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients? To prevent clients from being bille...Read the whole joke
498 Rating:0 | Voted:0
15 Two law partners leave their office and go to lunch...
- Two law partners leave their office and go to lunch. In the middle of lunch the junior partner slaps...Read the whole joke
472 Rating:0 | Voted:0
16 At night court, a man was brought in and set...
- At night court, a man was brought in and set before the judge.The judge said, "State your name, occu...Read the whole joke
619 Rating:0 | Voted:0
17 How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
- How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?How many can you afford?...Read the whole joke
522 Rating:0 | Voted:0
18 The way he died
- A person is in the hospital and asked his doctor how much time does he have left to live. The doctor...Read the whole joke
474 Rating:0 | Voted:0
19 In a long line of people waiting for a bank teller...
- In a long line of people waiting for a bank teller, one guy suddenly started massaging the back of t...Read the whole joke
471 Rating:0 | Voted:0
20 Best advice possible
- Taylor was desperate for business, and was happy to be appointed by the court to defend an indigent ...Read the whole joke
458 Rating:0 | Voted:0
21 An elderly patient needed a heart transplant...
- An elderly patient needed a heart transplant and discussed his options with his doctor. The doctor s...Read the whole joke
495 Rating:0 | Voted:0
22 The scene is a dark jungle in Africa...
- The scene is a dark jungle in Africa. Two tigers are stalking through thebrush when the one to the r...Read the whole joke
707 Rating:0 | Voted:0
23 Being under oath
- "You seem to have more than the average share of intelligence for a man ofyour background," sneered ...Read the whole joke
490 Rating:0 | Voted:0
24 A tough case was being argued in court...
- A tough case was being argued in court. The defense attorney,feeling that he was in trouble, sent t...Read the whole joke
445 Rating:0 | Voted:0
25 Did you kill the victim?
- Prosecutor: Did you kill the victim?Defendant: No, I did not.Prosecutor: Do you know what the penalt...Read the whole joke
550 Rating:0 | Voted:0
26 What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?
- What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?Your Honor....Read the whole joke
473 Rating:0 | Voted:0
27 That was an insult
- A man came storming out of the courthouse ranting and raving; obviously really angry . He stomped ac...Read the whole joke
542 Rating:0 | Voted:0

# Title Category Hits Rating
1 The scene is a dark jungle in Africa...
- The scene is a dark jungle in Africa. Two tigers are stalking through thebrush when the one to the r...Read the whole joke
Legal Jokes 707 Rating:0 | Voted:0
2 What do you call an honest lawyer?
- What do you call an honest lawyer?An oxymoron....Read the whole joke
Legal Jokes 629 Rating:0 | Voted:0
3 At night court, a man was brought in and set...
- At night court, a man was brought in and set before the judge.The judge said, "State your name, occu...Read the whole joke
Legal Jokes 619 Rating:0 | Voted:0
4 Do you know the problem with lawyer jokes?
- Do you know the problem with lawyer jokes?Lawyers don't think they're funny, and the rest of us don'...Read the whole joke
Legal Jokes 593 Rating:0 | Voted:0
5 Why don't you ever see lawyers at the beach?
- Why don't you ever see lawyers at the beach?The cats keep covering them up with sand!...Read the whole joke
Legal Jokes 583 Rating:0 | Voted:0

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