Q: How many lead trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?A: Fifty. One to do it and the others to stand around and say, "I could do that better.Q: What do lead trumpet players use for birth control?A: Their personality.Q: What is the difference between a trumpet soloist and King Kong?A: King Kong is more sensitive.Q: What's the difference between trumpet players and government bonds?A: Government bonds eventually mature and earn money.The best recording of the Haydn Trumpet Concerto is Music Minus One.Q: How to trumpet players traditionally greet each other?A: "Hi. I'm better than you."Q: How do you know when a trumpet player is at your door?A: The doorbell shrieks!